Debbie and Dylan:
Oh Deb - I've been meaning to call or email you but like I said in previous posts, time just slips through my fingers like sand in the hourglass (these are the days of my life).
Dylan - I still have your email from August in my inbox to respond to. I see it when I check my email and think, "Damn, I need to reply to Dylan!" But alas, I do not. I've not forgotten though!
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
My Humanities Paper
I can't believe I forgot to tell you all what my humanities paper was about!
Unfortunately, the "Quran" and "Woman" thing didn't work out, but I did use a passsage of the Quran for my paper. The story is very similar to Christianity. God Is good - God is great - Believers shall go to a paradise as long as they follow God - Unbelievers shall rot in hell.
So what, you ask, was my paper in? I compared God to Greed, the Unbelievers are the peeps who got fucked in the housing crisis and the Believers are the bastards who profited off of them.
Hell, here I come!
Unfortunately, the "Quran" and "Woman" thing didn't work out, but I did use a passsage of the Quran for my paper. The story is very similar to Christianity. God Is good - God is great - Believers shall go to a paradise as long as they follow God - Unbelievers shall rot in hell.
So what, you ask, was my paper in? I compared God to Greed, the Unbelievers are the peeps who got fucked in the housing crisis and the Believers are the bastards who profited off of them.
Hell, here I come!
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Something New Everyday
Today, at the campus, I bought a fruit juice from a vending machine with my check card. Who knew you could do such things?
Monday, February 23, 2009
Monday, Monday
I am constantly looking for an excuse to not study, so blog I shall. I've gotten B's and C's on my last few assignments and/or tests so since it's not going my way, I want to quit. Being I always "Go Big or Go Home," my big seems to be moving out of the way and home is now in the lead.
I've started watching my Star Trek: The Next Generation Seasons 1 - 7. Again. It's only like 150 episodes or something - I can squeeze studying in between it all. I absolutely love TNG. I've had sexually fantasies about Captain Jean-Luc Picard for years. Oh, the things I would do to him if he'd just tell me to "Make it so," or to "Engage!" And if it were my time of the month he'd yell out, "Red alert!" Sorry - I know that's really nasty but I think it's funny as hell. Jimmy cracked corn and I don't care. I'm trying to find one of my all time favorite episodes where Picard, Guinan, Ensign Ro and Keiko all turn into kids as the Enterprise is being invaded. I just love the part where Lil' Picard needed to speak with Riker and threw a hellacious temper tantrum to do so. Hahahaha. One of my favorite scenes, but not as good as the one in the 2nd episode where the crew stumbles upon a virus that makes everybody horny and Data gets laid. Tasha Yar asked if he was fully functional and Data replied, "I have been programmed in multiple techniques." I need a Data. God, I am a sick puppy, aren't I? I must not be getting enough at home.
I have a psychology test tomorrow which I really should be studying for now, but I have such an awful time trying to manage my time. Plus rewatching all of the Star Trek episodes for the umpteenth time can be a bit consuming. I picked up a planner last time I was at Staples and have been trying, unsuccessfully to manage my time, hour by hour. I allotted myself break times and everything. Like everything else, it was all fine and fun for the first two or three days, so needless to say I'm back to doing things half-assedly. I do not want to take this test. It's like fucking biology. When we study stuff like mental conditions, medications, altered states of consciousness, I'm all up in it. But my test tomorrow is on the nervous and endocrine systems, what all different parts of the brain and what they do, like the corpus crispy thing that connects the two halves of the brain and the glands and stuff. I can't even tell you what the fuck the endocrine system has to do with anything so I really should start reviewing my illegible notes.
The higher, the fewer.
I've started watching my Star Trek: The Next Generation Seasons 1 - 7. Again. It's only like 150 episodes or something - I can squeeze studying in between it all. I absolutely love TNG. I've had sexually fantasies about Captain Jean-Luc Picard for years. Oh, the things I would do to him if he'd just tell me to "Make it so," or to "Engage!" And if it were my time of the month he'd yell out, "Red alert!" Sorry - I know that's really nasty but I think it's funny as hell. Jimmy cracked corn and I don't care. I'm trying to find one of my all time favorite episodes where Picard, Guinan, Ensign Ro and Keiko all turn into kids as the Enterprise is being invaded. I just love the part where Lil' Picard needed to speak with Riker and threw a hellacious temper tantrum to do so. Hahahaha. One of my favorite scenes, but not as good as the one in the 2nd episode where the crew stumbles upon a virus that makes everybody horny and Data gets laid. Tasha Yar asked if he was fully functional and Data replied, "I have been programmed in multiple techniques." I need a Data. God, I am a sick puppy, aren't I? I must not be getting enough at home.
I have a psychology test tomorrow which I really should be studying for now, but I have such an awful time trying to manage my time. Plus rewatching all of the Star Trek episodes for the umpteenth time can be a bit consuming. I picked up a planner last time I was at Staples and have been trying, unsuccessfully to manage my time, hour by hour. I allotted myself break times and everything. Like everything else, it was all fine and fun for the first two or three days, so needless to say I'm back to doing things half-assedly. I do not want to take this test. It's like fucking biology. When we study stuff like mental conditions, medications, altered states of consciousness, I'm all up in it. But my test tomorrow is on the nervous and endocrine systems, what all different parts of the brain and what they do, like the corpus crispy thing that connects the two halves of the brain and the glands and stuff. I can't even tell you what the fuck the endocrine system has to do with anything so I really should start reviewing my illegible notes.
The higher, the fewer.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
'D' is for Dumbass
Those who know me know I am not the most graceful of people. I remember one particular incident close to 15 years ago. While Michelle was at my house I managed to get myself stuck between an old leather chair and my bed, face down, ass up (dat’s da way we like to, sorry, I don’t know why rap’s been in my hiz-ed. ****). Michelle laughed hysterically and, come to think of it, I don’t remember her helping me get out of that crevice. When I try to be sexy and seductive I am instead clumsy, usually knocking someone in the face or accidentally kneeing the groin area of my partner. Last week I burnt myself on the top of the hand making brownies (the scab’s peeling off now and it looks like I have ringworm or something).
Yesterday I fell off the bed. Again. You see we have this bed that’s built naturally really high up with a pillow top mattress and, of course, then we have all the stuff I keep by my side of the bed, my laptop stand, school books conveniently strewn over the floor, in what is no more than a 3 and ½ foot space by the way. For whatever reason, I always think I can reach down and pick up books, appears or remotes from the floor. I always fall and scrape myself up. Every time – never fails. I cut the top of my ankle against something and it still hurts even if you don’t touch it. I nearly knocked over my laptop as I went tumbling down, hitting my head on the wall. And yet for some reason, time and time again (I’ve done this no less than five times), I continue to think I can grab the shit on the floor. Every time I ask myself (and so does My Man when he hears the commotion) at what point will I realize my arms aren’t long enough even when I stretch and teeter my ass on the edge of the mattress. Ka-boom!
I thought I was going to have to take my car to the shop because the light behind the speedometer and odometer and gas tank panel thing were out. I was out driving one night and I had no idea how fast I was going or what station the radio was on – apparently it’s all connected. So I told My Man about it one morning as I was heading out to school. He came out to the car and asked if I had a dimmer switch for the lights. I do and once I turned the dimmer up the lights popped back on. Without him I would have taken my car to the shop. This though may not be fully my fault because: a) I have no idea how I managed to turn down the dial; b) Why the fuck is there a dial? Don’t people have to see how fast they are going when their headlights are on? More money for the man I tell you.
And finally, during the brownie flesh burning session of ’09, I found out that the little switch on the top of the stove controlled a light in the oven. I was sooo excited. My Man looked at me like I had lost it.
Yesterday I fell off the bed. Again. You see we have this bed that’s built naturally really high up with a pillow top mattress and, of course, then we have all the stuff I keep by my side of the bed, my laptop stand, school books conveniently strewn over the floor, in what is no more than a 3 and ½ foot space by the way. For whatever reason, I always think I can reach down and pick up books, appears or remotes from the floor. I always fall and scrape myself up. Every time – never fails. I cut the top of my ankle against something and it still hurts even if you don’t touch it. I nearly knocked over my laptop as I went tumbling down, hitting my head on the wall. And yet for some reason, time and time again (I’ve done this no less than five times), I continue to think I can grab the shit on the floor. Every time I ask myself (and so does My Man when he hears the commotion) at what point will I realize my arms aren’t long enough even when I stretch and teeter my ass on the edge of the mattress. Ka-boom!
I thought I was going to have to take my car to the shop because the light behind the speedometer and odometer and gas tank panel thing were out. I was out driving one night and I had no idea how fast I was going or what station the radio was on – apparently it’s all connected. So I told My Man about it one morning as I was heading out to school. He came out to the car and asked if I had a dimmer switch for the lights. I do and once I turned the dimmer up the lights popped back on. Without him I would have taken my car to the shop. This though may not be fully my fault because: a) I have no idea how I managed to turn down the dial; b) Why the fuck is there a dial? Don’t people have to see how fast they are going when their headlights are on? More money for the man I tell you.
And finally, during the brownie flesh burning session of ’09, I found out that the little switch on the top of the stove controlled a light in the oven. I was sooo excited. My Man looked at me like I had lost it.
Skool Daze
How are my avid readers doing this glorious Tuesday? I have been extremely swamped with school work and I'm not sure how much more information my poor brain can hold. I knew it would be difficult and I would need to adjust, but I didn’t know it was going to be this tough. I feel almost like I bit off more than I can chew. I worked a full 8 hour day yesterday, crammed for my Humanities test during lunch, came home and had to wash the dishes and figure out what I was cooking for dinner (DING! I need to go take some meat out of the freezer so we can have dinner tonight – I shall return. BACK!! Did you miss me?). My head spins on a daily basis.
You said you wanted to hear how school's going? It's going. History isn't too bad - I thought it would be worse. The week before last I had to write something about The Great Awakening of America and the religious revivals and something about religious revivals today. I compared the revivals to Obama's presidential campaign. A! I had my 2nd quiz last week and I fell like an idiot. How the hell does one get a B on what is basically an open book test?
Psychology, psychology, psychology – a class in which I am surrounded by a group of young, stupid and ignorant people. A few weeks ago Teach was talking about little boys playing with dolls and asked if the class had an opinion. The black girl with long, claw-like fingernails and a helluva weave, raised her hand and said, "I'd let my 2 or 3 year old play wit' 'em but at 6 or 7 they need to stop. I don't want 'em to turn 'homo.'" I almost went down as home girl did the finger quotations around homo, and in one sentence she easily alienated any gays or lesbians in the class. I got a B on my first psychology test. The weaved out black girl started crying in class because she bombed it. I thought I was back in elementary school. Teach posted the group average and our Team Five scored the highest with a C - rounding out the class was another C and three D's, making me quite happy with my B. I turned in my first psych paper today, and as I’m sure I previously mentioned but let me remind you anyways), which is graded based off of a pass/fail system only. WTF?! I can actually write psychology papers.
English isn't what I thought it would be. It’s an online course where I can usually get away with doing everything half ass (like using the textbook on the History test and still scoring a B – maybe half ass isn’t working), but unfortunately this woman has us reading three or four chapters a week. Each chapter has 4 or 5 stories plus verbiage for creative writing. No, it doesn’t sound bad but it is. I’ll be happy to get a C in this class, but hey – that’s all I need to pass it.
And since you are all so interested in my school life, I will round out my babblings with Humanities. I find the class extremely fascinating. I learned who built the pyramids and how and why they were built; I found out that before Eve there was Lilith, who was banished to Nod as Adam didn’t like her because she felt she was his equal and because (and this really is QUOTED from my Humanities teacher), “she liked to be on top.” Don't we all? Anywho, this is supposed to be in the old Jewish writings so I’ll hopefully have the free time to research this. When talking about the story of Cain and Able, the professor compared Abel to a shepherd and Cain as a farmer and creator of totalitarian agriculture (which stops the natural cycle of life). Umm, I don’t know what they were smoking when they came up with this theory but that’s some strong shit. I took my first test today and I think I actually faired quite well (tune in next time for grade). And I thought this was to be my hell class. Oh, but before you exhale, it still is. I have that horrible paper due next week where I have to decipher the writings of one ancient person or the other and compare them to a current day news article, the first paper of two which account of 30% of my grade. I flipped through the book and I saw the works “Quran” and “Women.” It’s time for me to alienate any Muslim students in the class.
You said you wanted to hear how school's going? It's going. History isn't too bad - I thought it would be worse. The week before last I had to write something about The Great Awakening of America and the religious revivals and something about religious revivals today. I compared the revivals to Obama's presidential campaign. A! I had my 2nd quiz last week and I fell like an idiot. How the hell does one get a B on what is basically an open book test?
Psychology, psychology, psychology – a class in which I am surrounded by a group of young, stupid and ignorant people. A few weeks ago Teach was talking about little boys playing with dolls and asked if the class had an opinion. The black girl with long, claw-like fingernails and a helluva weave, raised her hand and said, "I'd let my 2 or 3 year old play wit' 'em but at 6 or 7 they need to stop. I don't want 'em to turn 'homo.'" I almost went down as home girl did the finger quotations around homo, and in one sentence she easily alienated any gays or lesbians in the class. I got a B on my first psychology test. The weaved out black girl started crying in class because she bombed it. I thought I was back in elementary school. Teach posted the group average and our Team Five scored the highest with a C - rounding out the class was another C and three D's, making me quite happy with my B. I turned in my first psych paper today, and as I’m sure I previously mentioned but let me remind you anyways), which is graded based off of a pass/fail system only. WTF?! I can actually write psychology papers.
English isn't what I thought it would be. It’s an online course where I can usually get away with doing everything half ass (like using the textbook on the History test and still scoring a B – maybe half ass isn’t working), but unfortunately this woman has us reading three or four chapters a week. Each chapter has 4 or 5 stories plus verbiage for creative writing. No, it doesn’t sound bad but it is. I’ll be happy to get a C in this class, but hey – that’s all I need to pass it.
And since you are all so interested in my school life, I will round out my babblings with Humanities. I find the class extremely fascinating. I learned who built the pyramids and how and why they were built; I found out that before Eve there was Lilith, who was banished to Nod as Adam didn’t like her because she felt she was his equal and because (and this really is QUOTED from my Humanities teacher), “she liked to be on top.” Don't we all? Anywho, this is supposed to be in the old Jewish writings so I’ll hopefully have the free time to research this. When talking about the story of Cain and Able, the professor compared Abel to a shepherd and Cain as a farmer and creator of totalitarian agriculture (which stops the natural cycle of life). Umm, I don’t know what they were smoking when they came up with this theory but that’s some strong shit. I took my first test today and I think I actually faired quite well (tune in next time for grade). And I thought this was to be my hell class. Oh, but before you exhale, it still is. I have that horrible paper due next week where I have to decipher the writings of one ancient person or the other and compare them to a current day news article, the first paper of two which account of 30% of my grade. I flipped through the book and I saw the works “Quran” and “Women.” It’s time for me to alienate any Muslim students in the class.
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